Tabse gun chala raha hoon … jabse tu apne maa ke andhar nahi, apne baap ke andhar tha
Bacha paida kahin bhi ho … banta waisa hi hai jahan bada hota hai
Laundiya ko ghumana ho, jeb mein haath daalo note nikal aata hai … laundiya ko gol-gappa khilana ho, jeb mein haath daalo note nikal aayega … laundiya ko cinema dikhana ho, jeb mein haath daalo … kya nikal aata hai? … (note) … lekin jab jeb phatti hogi, us mein haath daloge toh kya nikaloge … ghanta!
Gun chalane ke liye finger mein nahi backside mein dum hona chahiye
Moongphali mein chilke aur laundiya mein nakhre na hote … toh zindagi kitni aasaan hoti
‘A’ for apple, ‘B’ for ball ki jagah … ‘M’ for maa-ki aur ‘B’ for bhen-ki bolna seekh gaye
Lahu luhaan hua hai falak, yeh kaisa loha phigla hai … ek suraj doob gaya peeche, ek suraj samne nikla hai
Aaise aaise surpises diye hai … samne waale ne agle saal se birthday manana hi bandh kar diya
Koi atka hua hai pal shayad … waqt main pad gaya hai bal shayad … dil agar hai toh dard bhi hoga … iska koi nahi hai hal shayad
Ek ladki joh chhat se apne papa ko dhakel de, usse ka kehte hai batao? … push-paa!
(Aap log karte kya hai?) – Maar-keting … boss target deta hai aur hum target poore karte hai
Seeti bajhi rail ki alert ho jaiye … ticket katti aapki, seedha upar jaiye
Sari zindagi kai tasveerein seene se lagayi rakhi … kabhi khud ki tasveer yaad nahi rakhi
Ladki aadmi ko ganne se gudh bana deti hai
Tarcol ki ek sadak par do saaye hai … andhere ki najayaz aulaad hai shayad … ghoont ghoont khoon pee kar dono pale hai shayad … paon tale zameen hai na sar pe aasmaan hai … zindagi kuchal gayi, yeh unki daastan hai
Soovar ko saala goo hi khana chahiye … jahan usne gulkand pe mooh mara, haazma kharab hona hi hai
Isko daru na mile toh hangover ho jaata hai
Ek khwaab ne aankhen kholi hai … kya modh aaya hai kahani mein … woh bheeg rahi hai baarish mein … aur aag lagi hai paani mein
